Everything I need to know, I learned from The Shadow...

• Avoid blondes with ESP, especially if they are not aware of it.
• Hiding in the shadows does not make you a coward. It gives you an advantage.
• Knives that have a face cannot be trusted.
• Mos Eisley Spaceport is not the most wretched lair of viliany. New York City is.
• The past is never forgotten.
• Someone is always watching, around every corner, in every empty room.
• The sun is shining...but the ice is slippery!
• Pick a hobby, or something.
• It takes practice to be late to every little engagement.
• If a barbarian wants you help, go by hypnosis, that way you're innocent when it's all over.
• Sudden cravings for Peking Duck can bring unexpected results.
• If you want to impress someone, become fluent in Mandarin.
• Don't put down the US of A! (pal ^.^)
• When disarming a bomb, cut the red wire, just make sure it's red.
• Know your colors.
• If possible, get the War Department to pay all the bills.
• If you want to be a musuem currator, know your history!
• Whatever you do, DON'T open it!
• Always go in pairs when making a phone call.
• If someone comes up claiming to be the last desentant of a famous conqueror, you know something's up.
• Never make fun of a foreigner, he may cause you to jump off a building.
• If you have a dream in which you tear all the skin off your face and you're someone else underneath, be aware that you have problems.
• Beware of crazy cab drivers.
• Brooks Brothers sells nice ties.
• Never underestimate the appearance of an empty lot.
• Always have a cab with a trusted driver ready. Contributed by Jamina
• Basements of musuems are dangerous. Contributed by Jamina
• If someone goes around professing their need to punish all mankind, stay away from them! Contributed by Jamina
• When being spoken to by an invisible voice, don't bother to ask who it is. Contributed by Jamina
• You can't shoot The Shadow (except on the rare occasion he is standing in water). Contributed by Jamina
• The last man left is normally the one who is guilty! Contributed by Jamina
• Never chase after a flying knife.
• Follow the Tulku's advise: 'You don't want to do that!' Contributed by Jamina
• Multiple identities are a good thing.

Do you have anything to add to this list? Email all additions to kd7khe@arrl.net.

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